Hey Kristen,

It's fall on the shoreline! It seems like the leaves don't turn bright colors as quickly as upstate CT... but they're getting there! 

I decided to spend my writing time for this newsletter at the aquarium. The back-and-forth trajectory of the fish... there's something calming about it. 

I think what's also captivating about fish in big tanks - specifically at the aquarium - is their carefree existence. They are well taken care of, with no predators or uncomfortable temps. They simply must go... back-and-forth.

Our lives can feel so complicated; so full of ups and downs. We feel so much pressure to be "successful" and live a life of exponential growth, But if fish can understand their life has meaning - evidenced by their NOT ramming themselves into the side of the tank - how much more can we.. should we... be mindful of our worth?

Our value isn't measured by the size of our accomplishments or the quantity of our friend group. Our value is more measured by the quality of our joy - whether we realize it or not.

Think about it: there are times when we have the most inexplicable pride in who we are or have become, even when not much has changed. In those moments, we have allowed our joy to take over the depression or overwhelm. It becomes more apparent - with practice - that our minds can shift to allow in more joy.

I'm not saying that with practice we will never feel sad, or even cry ourselves to sleep... My depression has recently loomed over my head without remorse, compounded by health struggles that popped up without notice (as per usual).

What's different this time?

I was more open to and expectant of healing. I allowed myself to believe I would come out the other side... and here I am.

I have dreams. I believe I can create them and access them so that others can also access healing. It's just not the time for me to succumb to pain, hurt, or shame - AT ALL.

Thanks for reading! And look out for another email in a few days about a new resource by someone who has helped me move forward in many ways.

While I have not felt well enough to be up and writing on my blog recently, you can find what I have written before here, and also watch out for new posts published... soon?! 

Love you all.

With Joy, Love, and DEUCES!!!

Kris G.